


A Chance To Start Again

by DeadGhostWriter13



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:06:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25885549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeadGhostWriter13/pseuds/DeadGhostWriter13
Summary: Talia is the youngest Winchester sibling. She was a hunter, but it took its toll on her. Now staying with Jody Mills and her girls, Talia has a chance to start again.A budding romance with Claire could be just what Talia needs to start anew





	1. Leaving Behind

I woke up screaming from yet another nightmare. My door opened and Dean walked in, no longer running in with a gun, panicked as he did when I first started having nightmares. 

"Talia-"

"I'm fine Dean. Go back to bed."

"Are you-"

"Yes Dean!"

He nodded his head and walked out.

It had been over 6 months since the nightmares started, and more often than not it was Dean who came to my room. Over time, I felt more and more like a burden, I saw the faces of my family change, worried and sad. I never talked about the nightmares to anyone. They were too hard to talk about.

As the nightmares continued to plauge me I was allowed to go on fewer hunts.

The next morning I was in the library packing to go on a case when Dean came in.

"Talia, what are you doing?"

"I got a possible case that I'm going to look in to."

"No, it's okay. Sam and I will take it."

"Alright, there's another one in-"

"Cas and Jack can do it. Text the details."

Of course this was happening. Getting put on the sidelines while everyone else hunted. It was starting to piss me off.

"I can do it-"

"Do what?" Sam interrupted.

"Nothing. Talia picked up some cases for us and Jack and Cas." Dean covered.

The door creaked shut. Alone in the bunker again for about a week. As per usual, I texted the group chat good night and good morning every day. 2 days in I had a nightmare, a really bad one. I got up and paused at my door. I was tired of this, the nightmares, the lack of sleep, being alone for days on end, not being allowed to hunt, I was tired of all of it. Tonight it all ends.

After a trip to the bathroom, I sat on the kitchen floor with a bottle of pain killers and a large assortment of alcohol. Before I started I pulled out my phone to say goodbye to my family:

_Me- I love you guys. So so much. You are an amazing family. See ya on the flip side._

Opening the alcohol and pain killers, I threw a few pills in my mouth with some beer.

My phone buzzed twice:

_Sam- Talia what are you talking about?_

_Cas- Is everything alright?_

A few more pills, a bit more alcohol and I finally started to feel something.

_Me- No more nightmares._

Finishing off the first bottle of alcohol, I quickly opened another, downing it fast. Next bottle, add a couple more pills.

Unknown to me at the time, my phone had been going off.

_Dean- Cas and Jack, are you going back to the bunker?_

_Jack- Yea, we finished the hunt a little bit ago, Cas is driving now_

_Sam- Dean and I are heading back too. How far away are you?_

_Jack- 5 minutes_

_Sam- Us too. When you get there try to find Talia_

5 bottles of alcohol sat next to me and I was about to take the rest of the pills in the first bottle when I heard the door open. 2 sets of footsteps, then Cas and Jack started to shout my name. The door opened a second time and Sam and Deans voices joined Cas and Jacks in shouting my name.

 **Just don't look in the kitchen** I think to myself.

"She's in the kitchen!" Jack called out.

**Shit did I say that out loud?**

I recognized Cas and Deans figures outside the kitchen. Alcohol and pills were taking too long, they would find me before I died. So I grabbed one of the empty bottles and smashed it. Taking a shard I started to slit my wrist. Dean came around the counter and quickly pulled it out of my hand before I was able to make a fatal cut.

"Talia what the hell?" he questioned.

Pushing away, I reached for another shard. His arms wrapped around me and pulled me back towards him.

"No. No! Please. No more nightmares. No more nightmares!" I cried out, delirious and panicked.

Dean stood up, taking me with him to the library. Still in a state of panic and delirium, I kicked his leg and attempted to get away. When that didn't work I made myself a dead weight. He picked me up and set me in a chair which I quickly dove out of and scrambled past him back to the kitchen, where I was intercepted by Cas who used his angel powers to calm me down. Much more pacified, I sat on the floor next to Dean.

The next hour was spent with my crying and blubbering, Sam and Dean talking with me, the two of them talking to each other, both talking with Jack and Cas, and a few phone calls that I didn't follow.

In the afternoon when I woke up Sam prompted me to pack my things to take to Jody's.

"Why?"

"We are forcing you to quit hunting. With last night's fiasco Dean and I feel it's best if you are in a semi-normal environment where you can be safe and safely monitored. This isn't a punishment Talia."

"Oh. Okay. Does Jody still have the other girls?"

"Yea. Alex, Claire, and Patience."

Not long after I'm in back of the Impala with my brothers in the front as we drove to Sioux Falls.


	2. A Big Lesbian Heart Attack

"When will you bring up my motorcycle?"

"When you aren't trying to kill yourself and are in a mentally stable state. Which will be determined by Jody." Dean stated calmly.

When we arrived at Jody's I was nervous. As I got out of the car she came out to greet us. It had been a while since I saw her. But my attention immediately went to the blond girl behind Jody on the porch.

"Hot damn. Dean, why didn't you tell me I was going to be living with a goddess?"

He turned and smiled, "Oh, Claire? What about her?"

Sam smiled as well.

"Does someone have a crush?" Dean teased.

"Could you be a bit quieter please?" I hissed.

Jody pulled me into a hug, halting the conversation.

"So what were you talking about as I came up? It better not be about graying hair."

"Right now I'm having a lesbian heart attack because of that hot ass goddess on the porch. Oh fuck I am not ready for this."

Jody, Sam, and Dean shared a look.

"What?" I asked. And then it hit me.

"Uh... Suprise I'm gay." It came out as more of a question then a statement.

Jody grinned, "Talia, I think you and Claire will get along great."

**Claire:**

Another girl was going to be joining them. Oh joy. Alex and Patience were sharing a room now so the new girl had her own room. Sounded like she will be a spoiled brat if Jody went out of her way to make sure the kid had her own room.

"Claire, please, be nice to her. She's been through a lot."

"So have I." I retorted.

Jody sighed, "Listen, they told me to keep her identity secret until they arrived. Since you don't seem thrilled, I think it's best if I tell you."

Jody walked to the door, "Come on. They're going to be here soon. We can wait on the porch."

Once we were outside, she sighed once again. It was her 'mom' sigh.

"Her name is Talia. Talia Winchester."

"Wait what?" Hold the phone, there's a third Winchester?

"Yea. For the most part she was put on the sidelines. But she's experienced a fair amount of world-ending events. Sam and Dean think she should stay here to clear her head. Being a hunter can be taxing on a person. Especially when they're as young as her."

"How old is she?"

"21, almost 22."

The purr of a familiar car filled my ears. Jody stepped off the porch to greet them. Never in a million years would I have expected to see a girl as sexy as the one who exited the back of Dean's Impala. There was a strange and brief interaction between her and her brothers along with Jody. It felt like they were talking about me.


	3. Behind A Shattered Mask Lies A Broken Girl

Sam and Dean stayed for dinner. Jody came in with wine. She started to hand me a glass but Dean snatched it away.

"Ah ah ah, nope, you aren't getting any. Jody, please make sure she doesn't drink any alcohol."

Of course, a shared look of confusion filled the table.

"Did you two actually explain to Jody why I'm here? Or just the bare minimum?"

"No, we didn't think you'd want us to."

I frowned at Sam and threw a glare at Dean.

"Oh, I see. But was that really the reason?"

Sam started to speak but I stopped him.

"Or was it the fact you didn't want to explain that I have nightmares to which I wake up from screaming? That after almost 6 months I still suffer from them, that you sideline me from hunts, leaving me completely alone? That one night after sidelining me and waking up from a nightmare, I decided enough was enough, that since I was alone you would be too late? That I tried drinking and overdosing before attempting to slit my wrists? That you guys were lucky to have been close to home?" At this point I was standing up, shouting.

"Do you think I'm such a screw up even Jody wouldn't want to take me in with full knowledge as to why? Fuck you! Both of you!"

I went to the door stormed out. Then I ran to get distance from them. After I felt it was a good distance, my pace slowed to a walk. Before I knew it, my feet had guided me to the place that felt most like home and where I could always go to release some steam.

Bobby Singers.

But that place was nothing but a burnt shell of a house and an abandoned automotive scrap yard.

It was like that because of the Leviathan, because of Dick Roman. They burned Bobby's house down, Dick Roman shot Bobby in the head. It wasn't lethal at first, but no doctor could ever save someone from that.

My knees buckled beneath me. I fell to the ground. The Talia I made everyone see and believe to be true was just a mask. I wasn't that girl, I never was. I've continued to wear it all these years, but now, that mask shattered, revealing the empty shell that is all I am.

Broken

Hollow

Cracked

Chipped

Empty

Scarred

Worthless

Now, that mask shattered, revealing that inside, I'm already dead. Everyone can see me now. Everyone can see me now, no, no I can't let them.


	4. A Saving Grace

How I ended up back at Jody's was a blank. I don't know how long I was at Bobby's, sitting in the dirt crying my heart out. What I do remember is a hand on my shoulder and a soft, sweet voice of a girl, "Let's go home Talia."

Of course, my brothers were still there. Alex and Patience weren't anywhere to be seen. I was on the floor with someone, sitting in their lap, but with my head still reeling and my vision blury I couldn't tell who it was.

"Hey, are you okay?"

There it was, that voice. Her voice.

Finally I lifted my head to see Claire. It was Claire.

No words came out of my mouth when I opened it so I shrugged my shoulders.

"How did I get back here?" I said, my voice a horse whisper.

"After you left, we thought it best to wait a little and give some space. A half-hour passed and you didn't come back. When we decided to look for you, we had no clue where to start. You hadn't been around town much. But it was Claire who thought of checking Bobby's." Sam calmly replied.

Claire was the one who found me. We hadn't even know each other for a day, yet she thought of where to find me. My brothers didn't think to check Bobby's.

But that meant Claire saw me crying and being an emotional train wreck.

"Thanks." I slurred.

"I think you need to go to sleep Tal." Claire worried.

"Don't like sleep. The nightmares-"

"I know. But you have to get some sleep, even if it gets interrupted by nightmares. Otherwise how am I supposed to hang out with a cool bad-ass like you? It wouldn't be as much fun if you kept falling asleep on me, now would it?"

I giggled "You're the cool bad-ass."

"We both are cool bad-asses." Claire grinned, leaning her head around my neck to kiss my cheek.

"But only if you go to bed." She added.

"Mmm...okay."

I let Claire help me up and lead me down the hall to my room.

<Sam, Dean, Jody>

"I feel jealous. Talia is never that compliant with me." Dean huffed.

Sam smiled, "I think this shows us that this is the perfect place for her to heal."

Jody nodded her head, "Agreed. Maybe it'll do Claire some good too."


	5. Note to readers

Hey there! I know I haven't posted new chapters in a while. I am so sorry for that. This work is not abandoned. My depression has reared its ugly head again and it hit me hard. I've been struggling to find the motivation/will to write. Like, I want to, but I just can't you know? I hate it. These stories are ones I love and have so many ideas for. I go to write and then nothing happens. I've gotten a little better. I was able to start a new story. I'm working through it. I feel so bad for not posting and I hope to be able to post more chapters. Depression sucks.

**Author's Note:**

> No posting schedule at all


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